It can be easy to think you’re coping with mental health challenges, especially if you’ve lived with them for a while. But as Nottinghamshire firefighter Drew Telfer discovered, sometimes it takes someone else noticing you’re not yourself to realise you need help.
For Drew, that person was a close friend – and it was the push he needed to reach out to his GP, and then to us.
Since then, he says his life has “improved massively.” And as a way of giving back, he recently completed a tough fundraising challenge with his brother-in-law, raising hundreds of pounds for us.
“When I joined Nottinghamshire – initially as an on-call firefighter in 2016 before going wholetime – I became the Station Rep for the charity, so I’ve helped organise car washes, challenges and fundraisers from the start really,” says Drew.
“It meant I was probably more aware of the extent of support available than others… I also met a few firefighters who’d had support and found it really helpful.”
That knowledge meant Drew knew where to turn when things got tough.
“I’ve lived with anxiety and mental health challenges for quite a while, most of my adult life really on and off, but they got worse over the last year,” Drew says.
“Eventually, I reached a point where simply trying to function on a daily basis became debilitating. On the outside, everything looked fine, but inside, life felt like torture.
“My best friend actually mentioned to me that I wasn’t myself and I needed some help. It was the realisation that someone else had picked up on it, that prompted me to reach out.
After contacting his GP and us, Drew says things immediately started to look up.
“The reassurance from the charity was incredible… the assessments were very professional but reassuring. They made it really comfortable throughout.”
Following his assessment, Drew began remote counselling sessions, describing the support as “second to none.”
“The calls were done over video, which made me feel comfortable at home,” he says. “I’ve had various therapy and counselling sessions over the years, but nothing ever felt as easy and reassuring. The therapist was amazing.”
Looking back, Drew believes he was finally ready to open up:
“I’d always dismissed things like meditation, but I’ve actually meditated every day since receiving the charity’s support. It’s completely changed my routine for the better.
“I’ve found that if you allow yourself time to think about the tough things, they tend to disappear, because you deal with them as they come. But if you don’t, and you put them to the back of your mind, they can soon take over.”
He later joined our online HOPE (Help Overcome Problems Effectively) Programme, which built on the work he’d been doing through his counselling sessions.
“It reassured me that what I was doing was helpful for others too,” he says. “It really helps you understand mindfulness and coping mechanisms.”
We then recommended our Reset Programme at Harcombe House to further develop his resilience and mental fitness.
“You’re not being judged at all”
Drew Telfer
“It backed up everything I’d learnt, and I also felt ready to open up to others,” Drew explains. “I’d taken the barriers down when I got there, and felt ready to share. It was a great place to do it because you’re not being judged at all. Everybody is there because they’re looking for support, for their own reasons.
“The week there was amazing, everything down to the food, the exercise, everything.”
“I can honestly say that since contacting the charity, my life has improved massively. I am so grateful for everything they’ve done for me.”
While Drew had organised fundraisers before, this time he wanted a personal challenge to test himself and raise awareness of our support.
So, with his brother-in-law Frazer – also a firefighter – Drew hiked from the south to the north of the Peak District over four days, wild camping along the way.
“It was hard work!” Drew says. “But there were enjoyable parts along the way. We did a lot of talking, and the views were amazing. It was good to push myself physically, as well as mentally.
“I appreciate every day so much more now – waking up without every thought being an anxious one is amazing.”
If you feel you’d benefit from our health and wellbeing support, you can call our Support Line on 0800 389 8820, make an enquiry online or click below: