John: “Online tools really help – we need to keep an eye on our wellbeing, even when we feel okay”

Retired firefighter John Willoughby shares how he found the courage to reach out for help following months of mental health challenges – and why finding proactive tools to cope early is so important.

Visiting one of our centres for support not only provides our beneficiaries with the space to relax and focus on their recovery, but it also offers a unique opportunity to spend time with others in the fire services community which, for someone who’s retired, can be incredibly valuable.

And that’s what retired LFB firefighter John Willoughby found when he was invited to Harcombe House following some difficulties with his mental health.

“It meant someone was supporting me when things got tough. I felt like I was at home, being there with others in the fire service,” says John.

This journey for John began in 2015, when he was badly injured during a game of golf. Midway through, he was accidentally struck by another golfer’s club and suffered a seizure.

“The ambulance came down and sorted me out on the golf course,” says John. “I was taken to St George’s Hospital in London and put into a coma for around seven hours. I stayed there for five days in total.”

John’s recovery spanned several months after the accident, due to his brain injury, and he says while that’s now recovered, he’s partially blind in one eye.

Having had the support he needed from the NHS at the time, John didn’t reach out to us then. However, he knew about the opportunities we offer to people like him in our fire family, so knew exactly where to turn a couple of years later when he began experiencing some mental health challenges.

“Around six months after the accident, PTSD came knocking on the door. That was horrendous for a couple of years,” says John.

“For me, my wife was the first one to spot it. She saw I was getting angry a lot, which I hadn’t noticed myself. I felt okay. Then the sleepless nights started with all the visions that came with them. It wasn’t great. Certain triggers started me doing really weird things, so now I’ve learnt to recognise those.

“I got in touch with the Charity when I was coming through the other side of that, feeling a bit better, and it helped me get to where I should be.”

John was invited to Harcombe House to spend some time away from his day-to-day routine, where he could focus on himself and his mental fitness, surrounded by others in the fire service.

“I went to Harcombe House twice, the first time settled my nerves a little, and I went again around six months later – on their request – and that further support was a huge help. It was just constant support,” John adds.

“I worked in groups there and I’m still in touch with many of them now. It gave me a release and meant someone was supporting me when things got tough. I felt like I was at home, being with others in the fire service.”

John has continued to have follow-up support externally, more local to him, to continue the process he started with us.

“Harcombe gave me the toolkit to start getting better and then it’s just about continuing that day to day. It’s not a quick fix, I’m constantly working at it – and still being in touch with some of my group now still helps that,” says John.

“If you keep on top of things you’re winning. But if you feel yourself slipping, you need someone else.”

John Willoughby

“We’re firefighters, it’s there for a lot of us. It’s just a shame when it rears its ugly head – but keeping a constant watch on your mental wellbeing really helps that.

“Having online tools there, particularly proactive support like the online courses The Fire Fighters Charity offers now, really helps too. We need to keep an eye on our wellbeing, even when we feel okay. Every day.

“If you keep on top of things you’re winning. But if you feel yourself slipping, you need someone else. And for me, that safe person is my wife. She knows when I’m struggling and knows what to do.”

John’s wife was also offered support around the same time, to ensure she had the help she needed while supporting him.

“After the support I had, I organised a bike ride from London to Brighton,” says John. “My wife also has a coffee concession unit and we raise money through that too. It’s so important to give back where we can.”

If you feel you’d benefit from our health and wellbeing support, we may be able to help you. Call our Support Line on 0800 389 8820, make an enquiry online or register for My Fire Fighters Charity now and visit the ‘Access Support’ tab.

You can also join our ‘Share Your Story’ Group in the app, by clicking on the ‘Groups’ tab, to chat to others who have received our support or enquire about sharing your own story.